Don’t have to see you every day, I just want to know you’re there

2011/02/27 § 1 Comment

A long time ago,
I wrote down how I wanted my funeral to be. As a precaution. Now I will post this on my blog. For fun. I do think that some of these preferences have changed. Perhaps I need to sketch a second draft?

I want to be burned (on a fire, not in an oven). Try to make me at least a little bit attractive. I want my ashes spread over the ocean (forget this, this sounds so much better! >>> “I want to have my ashes emptied into fireworks that will explode in an extravagant display over whatever city I come to love most in my lifetime. The dust will then trickle down through the air and land on the shoulders of all the people I never got a chance to meet.”) The fire can be on a cliff somewhere; this way, you won’t have to spread me – nature will do the rest. Now, I will be both in the water and in the wind – when the wind blows you can think of me thinking of you. You will breathe me in.

I will be transported to the cliff in an old, dark car (like the one the brothers drive in Supernatural) or a white carriage with black horses. I want Desert Song to be played while I burn (preferably live, but I can forebode the difficulties of this, so just playing it from speakers will be fine. No recorded live-versions, though – I refuse to let my funeral be ruined by whining, screaming 14-year olds).

All the women must wear veils, hats and big black dresses, and all the men must have top hats and canes. After the burning, there will be served food where my parents got married. There will be several types of tea, brownies, cupcakes and lefse. Everyone should be dancing and everyone should be happy. Don’t be shy with the alcohol, it’s what makes people happy.

I do not want to donate any organs or other body parts. I once read about a religion/belief/something where bad things happened to you if you didn’t stay intact. Best not to take any risks (but I am burned? I will never be intact anyways!?)

Whoever wants to can come to my funeral, seeing that they follow the dress code and are happy. I do not want anyone to hold speeches – if anyone has anything to confess, they can write me a letter. I would, however, appreciate some roses.


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